Monday, January 10, 2011

FML, It's A Snow Day!

Don't call your brother a jerk...take your shoes off, they have snow on them...stop spinning the lamp shade...yes, I'll make you hot chocolate just please stop asking me...WHO POOPED?...could the tv be any louder?...stop throwing Cheetos...your brother is not a stupid baby...GET OFF THE COFFEE TABLE...I can appreciate your use of gross motor skills to break open the old dead laptop but could you please not throw it across the room?...don't call your brother a girl, he can watch Power Puff Girls if he wants...please don't do a running jump onto me when I'm changing a poopy diaper...no Fairly Odd Parents...no kicking...NO BANSHEE SCREAMING!!!.... NO KNIVES!!!!!!!!!!!.......WOULD EVERYONE JUST CHILL THE FUCK OUT!!!!

Snow days. I remember when snow days were....not this. When I was a little Alice my plan of action for a snow day was more like...

Wake up LATE- bundle- play in the snow for 4 hours- unbundle- hot chocolate- Little House on the Prairie- bundle- make snowman until dinner- eat massive amounts of spaghetti with meat sauce- pass the fuck OUT!

God, I miss that- coming inside, my skin stinging from the frozen snow, the mouth watering smell of homemade spaghetti sauce. Most of the time my Papa had a fire going, too. Christ, I WAS Laura Ingalls Wilder:D....and now I'm Ma Kettle:/. 

Why do I have to tell them not to throw DVD's at each other? Shouldn't they just know that? I think parents should get an extra day off after snow days. At the very least we should get some free shit. That's a fun thought....what would I ask for??? Hmmm....GOT IT! Pajama Jeans!!! Or maybe donut holes. I dunno. I'd be cool with either one.

Coffee's ready. Peace.  
RIP, Old Ass Computer

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